Zumba

It was a pleasure attending our favorite Zumba class once again last evening.

Some of my friends were pretty regular at a point months ago in attending this class. That is how I started getting hooked to this one. The instructor is very good and she plays vibrant lovely music. Also, my experience says that if you are regular, even somebody like me (!) can pick up dance steps. The class gets filled up so much that if you need a decent spot, you have to arrive early. Decent means that you can get a good view of the instructor to copy her moves - or you are right behind one of those good dancers so you an refer to them when in doubt - and also there is enough room around you so that you don't risk stepping on somebody.

When each song ends and the next song begins, it is a pleasure to realize it is a song that you know and you have danced to in a previous class. She does bring in latest hit songs and introduces many new ones. It takes a while to get used to them and from then on, I am happy to hear them being played since I can manage the steps. She also brings in some Bollywood songs. I was super thrilled to hear this catchy song as a Cool Down song. I would have almost been dancing instead of doing stretches yesterday when I heard this particular one. Since I am not so up to date with new songs, it took some googling to locate this one.

Pee Loon from Once Upon A Time in Mumbai.

Anyway, this post is just to proclaim that ZUMBA is fun and if you have a chance to try it, PLEASE DO!

Bidding Good-Bye and the emotions associated with it

As we stand on one side of the security check at the airport, while Appa and Amma are on the other, putting their hand bags in the conveyor belt for scanning, I felt helpless. I was wondering what more could I do at this point. The truth that we all will have to go back to our own lives, stared at me. Just 10 minutes before, I knew this moment will come and I can tell both Appa-Amma and me were dreading this moment. We don't want to break out into tears and make it awkward and difficult for each other. But the emotions associated with the good-bye moments were overwhelming us.

As B and the kids hugged them one by one, I did not know what to do. May be because the culture of hugging is not in our family, even though I am accustomed to doing it with US friends, wasn't I still not able to hug my Appa-Amma?

It was weird and it felt sudden when Appa just moved on to the line of security check. He did not want to break down. I could see that. Amma waved ta-ta at the kids and us too from the line.

As we watched them complete the processes and as I hoped he would turn back and see that I am still watching them, I could see them walk into the airport. He did not realize that we are still watching them. They don't have cell phone, so the only thing I could do was to wait for his call when they are completely settled.

Throughout the car ride back home, B and I were talking and talking about how life would be for them when they go back. To continue with my own life, there are challenges awaiting me.

Finally the phone rang after I had gobbled up yummy Appams at our friends' place in our street. Appa and I caught up. He sounded energetic and we laughed about surviving the emotional moment with minimal tears. As we walked home from the friends', we saw an airplane up in the sky and my younger one goes, "Amma, I think Thatha and Paatti are in that airplane" and waved at it!

The quiet of the home is not new to us. Whenever B's parents left, the front room has stared at us with the void. It was the same this time. The kids tried to find something that Thatha and Paatti have forgotten by mistake.

I hope everything goes well for my parents as they step into the retired life and restart life in Bangalore.

Life's new routine

When kids had school, I was lost in a different kind of routine. Now it is different. No school for the boys. My parents are visiting us. So days are flying by so quickly. When you are in a routine bubble, it is so hard to break out of it. Each day has to be following the current routine and I cannot think of how I spent my days before this all started. I know when they go back, I will go back to the same old life - but it seems unthinkable now.

Timetable - we sleep late, but I don't like it when it is too late. I prefer to have the breakfast done by a certain time, then cook everyday for lunch and finish lunch by the same time everyday. Just because we don't have school does not have to mean that we do things out of schedule. That is just me and I stress myself around this a little bit.

Highlights of the summer so far are:

• I thought I would not be able to remember how to make Tamil oriented dishes since we cook mostly Mallu at my home. But I have been doing a good job so far with making good meals for my parents. My joy knew no bounds when my parents say they like what I made.

• I was amazed that I could go into this Tamil mode of cracking jokes and making parodies just because I have my Appa here. Some relations don't change over time and it is possible to be pick up from where we left. I am talking about being together in person - talking over phone is fun but different. To say the least, we do enjoy our conversations and a lot of time, listen to him talking whatever he chooses to.

• Making travel plans to take them to some places and making them happen has been fun.

• The best part is seeing the kids interact with them. When they enjoy and laugh at the pranks the younger one does and when they appreciate the older one for being the mature boy - I thank God for making this trip happen. Because I could not have showed them how my life now exactly is better than this.

• Nikhil is hooked to the 7 Little Words' app in the iPhone. I am happy he can connect with Thatha and learn the valuable lessons of vocabulary and English that I got from my Appa. When we three jointly work on each puzzle, I know in my heart I had always dreamt of this to happen if my Appa visits.

A.C is running constantly. It is so hot these days. But I like the way it has been going.

A Beautiful School Year

When I started Nithin at this new school, he cried one day - much less compared to the months of wailing in the car during drop off to previous school. Very soon, he made very close friends. What is more surprising is that the moms of these kids became real good friends. New friendships are interesting and fascinating. We enjoyed watching our kids play together and enjoy.

Pick up times during noon had an automatic chat session built in. We could not leave home with our own child without at least saying Bye to each other - even in case of hurry. All the kids in the school would leave, but our kids would play and play and we moms would chat and chat. Now I am not sure who was waiting for who? :-)

The kids learnt a lot during the school year. Socially, I could see Nithin blossom into a totally fine kid from the shy boy he was. It was truly a pleasure to see him open up with his pals. In the middle of the year, he used to cry if his close friends were absent from school. If they got picked up early, he has cried. But now, he seems to handle that much better. I am really thankful to his tiny friends for the role they played unknowingly in his social development.

Last Friday, the academic year ended. It was quite an emotional moment for me to see him walk into the stage with the graduate hat on. This whole year, whenever I picked him up in the noon, I have experienced the satisfaction of things working out the right way for him. When the boys giggled and ran around in the playground, my heart soared. I was never driven by the pressure of going to office after pick up. I let him have his fun time and then carried on with my mental ToDo list for the day.

Some afternoons, we headed straight to the restaurant where he wanted to have soup or Dosa. Some times we went to library. Most of the noons we relaxed sitting in our bed with the books he chose to read. Some we fought over Kumon while I yelled at him for not writing neatly. He would write one letter and run away from me and jump on the bed while I lose patience. I will really cherish the one academic year I spent with Nithin as a stay-at-home mom. Sometimes I stared at the clock which displays the date and time worrying about what lies ahead for me. I tickled him and cuddled with him and sometimes I was gloomy when he checked if I was sad.

The plan is to take care of the kids during summer. But I could not begin doing that without writing about the beautiful year that went by.

Mexico Times

Once I got this idea of all inclusive vacation in a resort, my mind was so determined about making it happen right away. Here are the reasons:

• I am still unemployed by choice (so far!), and I wanted to reap the benefits of not having to take a vacation to go on a family trip.
• My boys are not too small - so traveling with them should not be a nightmare anymore.
• The 9 year old and 5 year old have similar interests and get along well with each other regarding what they play and watch in TV. WHILE THIS LASTS, I wanted to make a memorable family vacation.
  

What started as an attempt to go with a bunch of friends' families, ended up as a family vacation. No regrets whatsoever!

All set with sunscreen and swimwear! On the day of departure, we were stuck in the Philly airport within the air plane for 3 hours - which was actually the duration of the flight itself. There is something with us and flights - we got stranded in the airport during our Disney trip and the connection flight would not take off due to mechanical issues. Anyway, when the flight finally landed in Mexico, I was more than thrilled.

Walking out of the airport, I was almost in tears because it felt like landing in India. The surroundings and the people all reminded me so much of the old Bangalore airport. For a moment, I could even picture my dad waiting there for me. That explains the teary eyed part, I guess.

Driving to the resort in the van arranged by the travel agent, don't laugh if I say it felt like
driving from Trivandrum airport to home. The weather, the coconut trees and the surroundings reminded me of the Shankumukham beach - all these came to memory.

As soon as we checked in to the room, we had decided to bid adieu to the sneakers and slipped on to flip-flops. We took it easy, had dinner and figured out where everything was in the resort.

The next morning, after breakfast, we headed to the beach. Pretty much every morning, we were at the beach until lunch time - when it got hot. The sea looked as blue as those pictures in the calendars. The sand was pristine and super clean. Nithin mostly focused on building sand castle. Nikhil helped him most of the time and also had his fun in the water. As days went by, my comfort level with the beach went up. Thanks to B, I ventured going the farthest into the ocean in my life.

One day, there was a sand castle competition. I motivated the boys to participate in it. B helped them a lot. I came up with the caption for the castle and we got a third prize of our team work called 'Templo Antiguo'. We were also called upon stage to receive the prize in the theater that evening.

One day, we went on a trip to Tulum to see ancient Mayan ruins. It got so hot so early in the day quite unexpectedly. The boys could not take the heat and would not let us listen to the tour guide's interesting talks that peacefully. After Tulum, we went to Xel Ha - the natural water park. B and kids ventured into snorkeling. I was not up for it, so I stayed in the land. Eventually Nithin was cranky and sleepy, so my not getting into water found its own meaning!

The dinners at restaurants within the resort were fancy. The only trouble was my being a vegetarian. They made some veggie stuff for me, but it is always a tension and I have go reminding them to make some.

It was funny to note that in Mexico, the Mexican food did not have sour cream as part of it. I had a tough time explaining what it is only to find out they don't use it that much. So the Mexican food we ate in U.S is what I expected, but it was not exactly the same. Thank God for the spicy salsas!

Overall, a trip for my lifetime. I will definitely cherish the memories of this trip always.

On raising the younger one

Not to be mean towards the older kid, but with the younger one - there is a lot of 'first-time' things which makes it interesting. It is too gratifying to see the younger one go through different phases and get exposed to new things. But with the older one, those phases are over and I have to work harder than ever before to come up with such new things.

For example, during this school year, Nithin started in a new school. He cried a lot in the old school, but I thought that is the only choice. Now in this school, may be due to his age or sheer luck, he has found 2 best friends. Every time I go park the car for pick up , seeing him play in the school playground with them happily, I thank God for bringing him where he is now. It looks as though I was forcing him to adjust with his fate in the older school and that he is now truly happy where he is. This friendship will have to come to an end when this school year ends for all practical purposes. We truly owe the confidence boost and sense of feeling at home with this school to the friendships he has built.

Each day is interesting to see the things he speaks now - the new words he learns from school or his big bro'. The first time for many things - new friendships, play dates, first swimming lesson, first Kumon class, first skiing lesson and first Ice Skating lesson. It is a challenge to get him started with anything new and it is truly satisfying to see him get over that initial stumbling block and flow freely with the routine.

I don't know how to put this into words - but isn't this easy to achieve compared to dealing with the older kid where we have already finished all these milestones? Teaching the 5 year old ABCs and getting satisfaction when he is able to read a page in an easy book is the EASY way to get parenting satisfaction I feel. And in every step with your previous experience, you already know what to expect in the next step and you are mentally prepared for it.

Another point is that, with the younger however little they do, we are thrilled and satisfied because it for God's sake - just their first time! Shouldn't we have a celebration that he went into the class without crying? He stayed without us near him for 2 hours! And for his age, this itself is a big deal! The level of expectation from the younger is very less and so is easily achievable for him.

But with the older one - it is not easy anymore. You have to work harder to maintain what you have built and you have to put extra effort to find NEW things for him to do! To challenge him further is not as easy as it is teach the younger one ABCs!

Playdates and more fun

John Lennon said: "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

I would like to rephrase it to say: Life is what happens to you while you're taking kids to birthday parties and play dates.

What an eventful week that was!

Tuesday was B and my 11th wedding anniversary. I scheduled our annual physical appointment with our physician that day, so we both can go together to the doctor and B will take off also. I like to flow with the habits enforced by the health care culture here in the U.S. So if anyone of you have been skipping the annual meeting with doctor - here is a reminder from my side. Please go!

We cut a chocolate cheesecake (I love cheesecake and Nikhil loves chocolate, so he picked a chocolate cheesecake from the grocery store!) in the morning. Kids were excited because only on these occasions they get so much sugar as part of breakfast!

It was a week full of play dates for Nithin. Back when Nikhil was small, I should confess I never knew the concept of play dates. I never consciously arranged one for him so that he could develop social skills. I was too busy for them and I was not aware too. Now Nithin is having so many play dates with compatible friends. It is fun time for the kids. It is also chat time for the moms. The weather was so beautiful and we spent some time outside in the park soaking in the sun. Make hay while the sun shines!

Yesterday, we bid farewell to another family who are moving to India for good. The potluck dinner was delicious and too much fun with Antaksari and Dumb Charades. Another set of families where the kids played well and adults had some game time. I am glad to be where I live.

Weekend marked B taking Nikhil to soccer game while I took Nithin to a fun birthday party. It is a relief to see him not shying away from people and taking part in fun activities with other kids. It was again moms' talk time - a different set of girls this time. It was a week filled with a lot social interactions and laughter and fun.